It begins with me!

I totally agreed with one of my teacher’s second reflection that it is not events (personal or work) in our lives that upset us, rather it is how we think about them. If something bad happens, I know of people who just complain and fear they will never feel better again. I think that such people don’t just get upset. Instead they contribute to their “upsetness”.

But someone else like him in the same situation said "This too shall pass” - and he know he is trying his best to handle it – both at home and in school counseling students.

I consider this as same event, but two different perspectives. I know we cannot control many of the things that happen to us, but I believe we can control how we react to them.

But what should we react to first? I read a book which distinguishes most of the problems people encountered as practical problems and emotional problems – where practical problems are difficulties and conflicts with others and external world. These include poor results, late payment, not having a date and not able to perform duty. Emotional problems are unpleasant feelings and emotional distress about our practical problems which include anxiety, anger, depression, guilt, shame and procrastination. Hence, putting first things first, I believe that it is important that we deal first with our own emotional distress about the practical problem and then to deal with the practical problem.

I myself would like things to go my way, but really there is nothing that says they should. I now keep reminding myself that I have what it takes to improve my mood - and my life. And it begins with me!